It’s about time… then again, maybe it’s not

Despite raging wars, skyrocketing gas prices and circling peace demonstrators, Dubya has taken the time to put his John Hancock to the Extended Daylight Saving (not Savings) Time proposition. Beginning in 2007, Americans will have another four weeks of artificially lengthened days. Well, lengthened on one end, anyway.

DST was initiated during World War I as an energy conservation measure. It returned during World War II and just kind of hung around like a houseguest who’s overstayed their welcome. Proponents of Dubya’s energy bill say the EDST component will save the country 100,000 barrels of crude a day. I’m not sure exactly how that translates to daylight, since most people gave up their oil lamps for electric lights around the same time DST took up permanent residence. Now we just burn more electricity in the morning instead of the evening. Not me, though. It is no coincidence that most days I look as though I got dressed in the dark.

Some of us actually like the dark. Thrive on it, in fact. Eat, drink, breathe, sleep and be merry in it. Speaking of sleep, I think DST wreaks havoc on our body clocks. It’s like deliberately inflicting jet lag on yourself without the pleasure of travel.

Some analysts are saying the move to EDST was made too hastily, and contingencies such as airline schedules will be adversely affected. Agricultural leaders are predicting a potentially negative impact on livestock. I could care less about airline schedules, but what about those poor cows? I can hear them now… “Geez, Bessie; I feel like I was just milked 11 hours ago.”

Likewise, what becomes of my electronic devices programmed in the DST days? I just got them trained to spring ahead and fall back on their own…God knows if I have to remember to change them, it will be time for the next cycle.

One supporter of EDST practically sparkled as he said “Kids across the nation will soon rejoice.”
He was talking about having an extra hour for trick-or-treating on Halloween. I have to wonder how much rejoicing will be done by the tired and elderly adults jumping up and down to answer the door for another hour Oct. 31.

He also failed to consider those children whose bedtimes are 7:30 p.m., regardless of the season. They are going to lay there even longer listening to their friends having fun outside before the daylight finally fades away. Maybe he was one of them as a child and this is his revenge.

I also have to wonder about the impact on our youth too young to understand trick-or-treating. When our youngest was 2 years old, and we went to pick her up at about 5:10 p.m. that first weekday after “falling back.”
“Why did you leave me here until after dark?” she asked and started crying. She thought she’d been abandoned.

That same EDST genius said, “It makes everyone sunnier.”

I’ve got two words for him: Bite me.

I feel sunnier already.

Reprinted courtesy Eagle Newspapers, Syracuse.